Wednesday, October 10, 2007

You Must Take Responsibility for the Image You Put Forth

I tuned into the Tom Joyner Morning Show yesterday, just at the point where he was about to interview Karrine Steffans, you know- Supahead.

Well, she repulses me, so I tuned into another station.

I'm listening to them this morning, and they begin off their day with cracking on her, and I wonder what happened. So, they replay the interview, or dare I say, the attempted interview from the day before. She began the interview talking about how great her life was. That she was living in Beverly Hills, and engaged to be married. The men were surprised that she was engaged.
Soon into the interview J.Anthony Brown asks her if she has a count of how many men she's been with. She tells him that's a tacky question, and he persists, which causes her to hang up on Tom Joyner.

I had to laugh myself at the ridiculousness of her hanging up on Tom Joyner.

A few minutes later, Tom went to open phones, where one of the callers told them that they were right in asking the question, and then told them....

J- You're going down as a great comedian.
Tom's going to go down as a great DJ.

And J.Anthony Brown took the lead from the caller and said that Supahead was going down in a few minutes.

The whole studio got a chuckle at that.

Later on, I happened to turn on the show and he had another regular on, called some sort of comic, and their entire routine today was about her. He commented on her getting married, and this would be the first party where the bride would be featured at the bachelor party. Or, that when the preacher says ' you may kiss your bride', the groom would be better off shaking hands. Then he went into a routine about what would be her favorite movies (Jaws, Blow, etc.)

As I listened, I could hear the audience laughing, but I couldn't. I just thought what they were saying was mean. Yet, I couldn't argue against it, because, after all, this was a woman whose claim to fame was not one, but two tell all books about the famous men that she had serviced.

After all, SHE gave herself the name of Supahead. Didn't she think that there would be ramifications about that? Have we, as a society, come to the point where a woman like this would actually be considered BRIDE material by a man?

When you put all your business out in the street like that, and expose yourself to be concubine for whatever rich man came your way, why did she think that she deserved to be treated with any sort of respect? Men were treating her the way that she had treated herself. And, not only did she treat herself that way, but she had no problem telling the world about her doing it, in TWO BOOKS. How can she think that she was supposed to get any respect. It's not like she was Maya Angelou, Nikki Giovanni or any other Black writer. She was going to be on the show because she was discussing another tell-all book of famous men she had serviced. She presents herself to the world as a whore and then wonders why she's treated as such? Why, because she put her whorish exploits down on paper? Was that supposed to clean them up and make them not as disgusting as they were?

While I was uncomfortable listening to Joyner's show this morning, I'm not going to blame him. He didn't put the material out there, and in his cruelty, he called her on the ridiculousness of her actually thinking that someone was supposed to take her seriously.

What upsets me is that this woman is put forth as anything BUT the image of a Black woman YOU NEVER WANT TO BE. Yet, why am I worried that THAT lesson goes over the heads of some of our young women?


Elegance said...

Sometimes when women are mistreated as children, usually by a male, they end up like Supahead. I doubt that she just turned out this way because she had a whim one day. Why do you care so much what this woman does?

Elegance said...

I'm not condoning what she does but there are a lot of abused women out there who turn out just like her. There are a lot of abused men out there who end up becoming abusers. There are a lot of factors that go into influencing who a person becomes. Although she seems proud of herself and confident, maybe she isn't all the time. Maybe its just a front so that she doesn't have to confront her past and who she has become.

rikyrah said...

Bronze Trinity,

I understand exactly what you're saying, and I gave her leeway after the first book. I was hoping that she had learned from her mistakes. That she had done some self-inspection and wanted to work on healing herself.

But, what am I supposed to think when she comes out with ANOTHER book on how much of a whore she was?

Does that sound like someone who has learned from their mistakes? Does that sound like someone who is searching for the reasons behind the actions of the two books?

She's put out two books on how she's a whore, and then believes she's supposed to be treated like she's a PhD on the track to winning a Nobel?

We wouldn't even know who she was unless she had put this forth into the world. What's the message of her books? How to be a whore and get paid DURING and after by writing a book?

I believe she's in pain. I can see that. But, she doesn't seem to want to face it, but stop trying to make like she's something anymore than what she put herself out in the public sphere as.

rikyrah said...

Got cut off...

That is why her hanging up on Tom Joyner told me she was delusional.

The image of Black women has always taken a beating, and she contributes to it negatively. She's not part of the solution; she's part of the problem.

Elegance said...

I think a lot of people don't want to face their pasts because its too painful. She has a reputation now and I don't think she can do anything to erase it. So maybe instead of getting therapy and dealing with her psychological damage she is trying to avoid it and make money off it. She's like an addict who takes drugs to hide the pain and refuses to admit that, or that she has a drug problem. She seems to be totally hiding from reality. I haven't read her books but I'm guessing that she has probably been sexually assaulted. Plus, after being used by so many men, how do you just get over that? If she does face reality then she definitely won't like what she sees. If that was your life would you want to face it? Or would it be easier to just deny the negative and act like a superstar?

Constructive Feedback said...

Funny how last year when Bill Mahr was her date to an awards show he figured that he could better relate to Black people because he scored with one later that evening. :-/

We can't be judgmental about "Supahead". What about her upbringing that has lead to her current behavior. We must "expand the police tape" and consider all of the evidence beyond the crime scene. This society has it in for Black women. You all know what White men (and Clarence Thomas) see Black women being good for.

Brian said...


rikyrah said...


You don't like or get my post? Is that why the ?????

MartiniCocoa said...

Karrine probably thinks that because everyone forgot that Paris Hilton's 'career' started with a porn tape, she would be afforded the same luxury.

Bronze Trinity: And there are a lot of abused women who don't. They are living lives that don't mean exchanging their vagina for a paycheck or Bobby Brown's tongue down your throat
even though someone treated them less than kind.

They transformed their experiences instead of continuing the downward spiral.

I would have more understanding of Karrine's position if she handled the embarassing questions with a hint of wit, humor, intelligence --something other than acting like a immature, clueless child.

Her hanging up says (to me) I just want to take the money and never ever actually deal with myself and my issues in a fundamental way.

Elegance said...

Well of course people handle things in different ways. Thats like saying some people recover from abuse or illness while others never do. She is one of those who didn't recover or atleast did not figure out a healthy way to deal with her problems. Those people who don't turn out that way are lucky. Some people CAN'T transform their lives without outside help.

You would understand her better if she was funny? What is she here to entertain you or something? If she doesn't act the way you like then she is a horrible person?

houstonrealtor said...

Here is the song that J Anthony Brown came up with after she hung up. I was rolling!!!