tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21083673.post7737462566120411608..comments2023-10-28T03:07:12.758-07:00Comments on Mirror On America: No Apologizes: On The Killing of Trayvon Martin And Being "Good"Brian http://www.blogger.com/profile/07872444863142531165noreply@blogger.comBlogger1125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21083673.post-20291404202221096602012-03-23T06:41:31.670-07:002012-03-23T06:41:31.670-07:00This piece was so so good. Hit home with me.
I f...This piece was so so good. Hit home with me. <br /><br />I feel as if I have been carrying this big bucket of $*** around for most of my life. Despite making HS honor role...I am not sure how many times in those last 2 yrs. Despite doing a decent job w/ my education. Despite excelling at just about every job. Despite not having even a parking ticket on my record... Despite working side by side with authorities everyday... keeping the peace...chasing criminals for a living (although I really really hate my job).. the truth is... when I leave work and remove the uniform.... i'm just another guy who fits the description (even though I don't wear the hoodies, the jerseys or any sort of hip hop generation attire whatsoever...) I still feel like a guy who fits a description of a suspect somewhere. I think Dave Chappelle talked about this at length in one of his routines. It's part of the reason why I keep myself fairly secluded... (in addition to my normal introversion and my slight social anxiety). I never feel safe... even when I carry my public safety ID.<br /><br />Back when I was poor....well, poorer than I am today... (because i'm still broke), when I had a really beat up vehicle... and lived in a mostly white area of St. Louis County... the County Police (and tiny muni departments too) would pull me over often. (Well often for me... I counted at least 6 times in a span of a couple of years). No real justification. Just wanted to know what I was doing in the area. I F****** LIVE HERE!!!! <br /><br />One even watched me leave my apt... go to the apt office to pay bill... and enter my car again... just to stop me right away (he admitted no traffic violation involved)... just ran my plate and it came back to another vehicle. Turns out, his dispatcher made an error on 1 digit. I was just out to do laundry that day. (one of the few times that I leave apt).<br /><br />None of the traffic stops resulted in anything. On one stop, on my way home from work, a small muni dept officer saw me in uniform, told me to have a good one and went about his business. The others... I just showed my public safety license (for trained security officers here in St. Louis)... no problem... except for one occasion... where officer needed to make his quota.. Got ticketed for not coming to a complete stop (BS...) I made that ticket disappear.... basically unbeknownst to the young officer I had a connection in his department, lol. <br /><br />These things are nuisances for me (so far) because I have to take time out of my day to get things in order. And I have more than enough stress already. For some... it's worse.<br /><br />But Danielle Belton spoke to something real for me.Brian https://www.blogger.com/profile/07872444863142531165noreply@blogger.com